Shining Vale had potential: haunted house, troubled heroine, and some family drama sprinkled in for flavor. But instead of giving us spooky fun, it dusts off the ol’ “crazy woman” trope and asks us to enjoy watching a mom spiral into madness. Spoiler alert: it’s not that fun. With gaslighting, victim-blaming, and a finale that makes The Babadook look like a warm hug, this show turns its leading lady into the ultimate villain… of her own life. Ghosts? Optional. Regret? Guaranteed. Read More …

Hold Your Breath promises a spooky tale of dust, doom, and drifters, but instead, it just dusts off some tired old tropes. Gaslighting? Check. A “crazy” woman who just can’t be trusted? Check. A mysterious Grey Man who might just be her mental breakdown in disguise? Triple check. It’s less about chills and more about the thrill of watching a capable woman unravel, one cow-feeding mishap at a time. If you’ve ever felt like the villain in your own life story, Hold Your Breath has got you covered… with condescension and laudanum. Read More …

Ever wonder how a movie starring George Clooney and Brad Pitt could be… boring? Wolfs pulls off that impossible feat by turning 90 minutes of action-comedy into a marathon of “fuck yous.” Think of it like watching two drunk dads argue at a BBQ. Spoiler: We deserved better. Read More …

In Dragon Age: Absolution, they didn’t just crank a story about a heist in Tevinter—I threw in the emotional rollercoaster of family. Not the cuddly, warm kind either; more like the “who the hell are these people?” type. Add a sprinkle of side quests that make you rethink your life choices, and you’ve got more than just a quest for an artefact. This one’s about finding trust in unexpected places—and probably losing it just as fast. Side note: Who knew chaos could be so relatable?
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In Dragon Age: Dawn of the Seeker, we follow Cassandra Pentaghast, a badass warrior with a serious anger management problem (but in a cool way). She’s on a mission to save the world, one blood mage at a time, while stabbing anyone who gets in her way. This film mixes epic action with the deep lore we love from the games. If you’ve ever thought, “I need more sword fights and moral dilemmas in my life,” this one’s for you. Read More …

In Borderlands, chaos reigns supreme, and not even a loot chest can save you from the WTAF narrative. Lilith, played by Cate Blanchett, is back on Pandora, looking for a girl who might have the key to—you know what? The plot doesn’t matter. Brace for a run-down on this year’s best example of poor decision-making. Hashtag all the insanity. Read More …

Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle heads off on a video game adventure, where awkward teens get trapped in avatars way cooler than they are. It’s geeky, hilarious, and surprisingly deep, tackling friendship and self-acceptance while Dwayne Johnson flexes his pecs, Kevin Hart funnels raw energy from the sun, Jack Black channels his inner teenage girl, and Karen Gillan proves that jungle chic is a thing. It’s a reboot that actually works, blending action, comedy, and enough 90s nostalgia to make you feel renewed. Who knew jungle peril could feel this good? Read More …